We're Building Up the Temple

Had a great weekend with family and friends. Ultimate Frisbee Friday afternoon with my CC team (always great). Sounds baseball game Friday night with friends which included an awesome Michael Jackson medley fireworks show and running the bases (the kids - not me). Faan (Food Allergy and Anaphylaxis Network) walk and events at Centennial Park on Saturday morning (great cause and a lot of fun) . Hilarious skit practice with six 4th grade boys for the upcoming talent show (so funny!) Fantasy Football draft party with Carter and his 4th grade football team (watching the boys get into the live draft was great). Titans game Sat. night with friends. 2 great worship services with brothers and sisters Sunday including an amazing song service of praise Sunday night. It was a busy weekend but full of fun activities and that's the way I enjoy it. This morning it was back to the routine and God reminded me during my time alone with Him that each day is a blessing....and I'm grateful for every one.

My class built this on Friday....can you tell what it is?




















No? Hey, they did it in about 20 minutes so all things considering, it's not too bad. It's supposed to be Solomon's temple. If you looked inside, you'd see 2 cherubims and the ark of God complete with two stone tablets. They each had a part of the temple to build and contribute. We build it each year and it always looks basically the same, but each class gives it their own personality. We are studying I Kings in Bible class as you may have guessed. It's always fascinating to me (probably more to me than the kiddos) how much detail is given to this temple in the book of I Kings. Go back and read chapters 5-8 at some point. The temple was exquisite. It was made of the finest materials and no expense was spared. It even says that no hammer or nail was used....every piece just fit into place. How amazing is that? I would've loved to have seen this temple in person. I can only imagine how amazing it would've been. After it was finished in chapter 8, God's presence fills the temple like a cloud. Obviously, He was pleased as His Spirit moved through the entire building. What a wonderful place that would've been to visit, worship, praise, pray, sing, meditate, etc. When I had the pleasure to visit Jerusalem a few years ago, I saw where the temple once stood, but of course it is no longer there like it was. And I think that's how it's meant to be.

I Corinthians 6:19-20 reads:

¹⁹ Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; ²⁰ you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

A physical temple is no longer needed for God. We are the temple. You. Me. According to this and other verses, each of us in our own bodies houses the Spirit of God. His presence still fills the temple like it did in Solomon's day. What a wonderful reality. We don't have to travel to Jerusalem to see the temple or even the remains of it. We see the temple every time we look in a mirror. God has built a new temple inside of us and we are to use it to glorify God every second of every day. Sometimes we (myself included) mess up and defile the temple but we never lose the presence of God or His Spirit. And check out this amazing verse I discovered the other day.

2 Corinthians 5:5

⁵ Now the one who has fashioned us for this very purpose is God, who has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.

GUARANTEEING. I love that word. Our salvation is guaranteed and we have the Spirit of God inside us as a "deposit"..... as an assurance. When I read that the other day it was a complete renewal of my hope, longing, and assurance of Heaven one day. Why do we often live like we're trying to "earn" Heaven when it's already been given to us? We should live like we're going home and celebrating what is to come. Heaven is not ours to win. We've already won it! It is only ours to lose if we choose through our sin not to accept this amazing gift. From now on, I plan to try even harder to abstain from sin, not because it'll keep me from Heaven (as it can), but more importantly because it tears down God's temple. It defiles what He's given me and is a slap in the face to my Father when He's blessed me with a "guarantee" of eternal life with Him.

If someone gave me a wonderful birthday gift, I would never offend them or go against them in return. Why would this gift from God be any different?

Build up your temple. Make it a house of God that he is pleased with. And realize that His Spirit inside you is the first taste of what is to come. It's assured. It's a given. It's definite. It's Heaven. Praise God!

I love God, Griffin, my Girl, and my Guys.

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert

Be Weird!

Planning to run three times this week. I'm still slowly getting over my heel injury. That one was a doosie. Doosie. What a weird word. Is that even how you spell it? This is telling me it's misspelled, but it has no suggestion. But I can't think of a synonym. It was a doosie of an injury. It has taken forever to get better. It's still not 100% but it's much better. I ran 5 miles yesterday and the heel hurt a little this morning but not nearly as bad. I plan to run tomorrow and Friday. I want to get back into it....just have to wait for my rickety old body to kick in. Doosie? Doosy? Douisy? Weird word.

Speaking of weird....I've made a discovery and I believe it to be 100% true. Nobody can convince me otherwise. Here it is.....kids are weird! That's it. I'm around kids all the time and they are weird. They say weird things....do weird things.....they're just weird. Even high school, soon to be adult, kids are weird. My Cross Country team is weird and I shared this same speech with them last week in our team devo. I told them they are weird. Don't get me wrong, I love them and I love being around them each day.....but they're weird. Especially....ok, really only...my guys team. Here's an example....I came to our field house one day last week and walked into the guys' side. Here's some pictures of what I saw.....



















































Apparently, the day before, during their "run", they had found some nice items to decorate the field house with. I call the items TRASH but they call them "art". After I had left for the day, they had taken the time to hang up these items and decorate. They love it. I think it's pretty dumb to be perfectly honest but whatever. It's their field house. And I told them, if that's the weirdest thing they do all year, I'll be just fine. Just don't be too much weirder. Maybe pushing a grocery cart while running is a better workout anyways. But it backs up my point....kids are weird. I'm weird too sometimes. Maybe that's why I like being around kids so much. We're all weird at some point....right? I propose today that maybe we should be weird. In fact, I have no doubts that we should be weird spiritually.

Here's what I mean....being "weird" means being different. And aren't we called to be different? I told my runners that I'm fine with them being a little weird in their choice of decoration, but I'd also like them to be weird spiritually. I'd like for their friends and classmates to think they are weird when it comes to their spiritual life. Maybe they lead a prayer at a random time....weird! Maybe they talk about God in their conversation....weird! Maybe they even turn off their radio while driving around with friends and sing a song to God.....very weird! That would be very hard for them, I know. That would be hard for any of us. We don't want to be weird. We want to conform and be like everyone else. We want to fit in and be the same. We want to be accepted. Being weird sometimes means being excluded. But if enough of us are weird, maybe being weird won't be so weird. Say what?

I was just trying to convince them...and me...and anyone to be different from the world. Most of the world isn't giving God what He deserves. Most of the world is concerned with self first. Most of the world is on the wide road to destruction and not on the narrow path to life. So we're called to be different...to be weird. Consider these verses, the first from Paul, the 2nd from Christ....

^{Romans 12:2
2} Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

John 15:18-19

¹⁸ “If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. ¹⁹ If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.

It may be uncomfortable or awkward or out of our comfort zone, but we're called to be different...to be weird.

So be weird today. I'm trying to be.

I love God, Griffin, my Girl, and my Guys.

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert

What a Gift!

Yesterday was my birthday. Not my actual birthday, my spiritual birthday. 24 years ago yesterday I was baptized into Christ. It's funny, it means so much more to me as I grow up then it did at the time. Don't get me wrong, I knew what I was doing and I feel good about when and how I did it, but it just means a lot more to me now. Anyways, I received a day-late birthday gift from God this morning. I wasn't expecting it but He gave me quite a show and I just had to write about it. Here's what happened....

I was driving to Woodlawn cemetery this morning. This makes 8 school mornings in a row that I've gone to Griffin's grave to talk and listen to God. I've seen some beautiful skies and sunrises the last 7 mornings but this morning took the cake. Actually, it totally demolished the cake. This morning without a doubt was the most beautiful sunrise and sky I've ever seen. As I was driving, I went around a curve about a mile away from the cemetery and literally gasped. The sky was full of bright, pink clouds. It was amazing. I also literally almost swerved because it took me by such surprise. I pulled over. I wanted to just look at it so badly. I wanted to capture it. I wanted to share it. I wished I had my camera. Then I remembered my Ipad. It takes pictures, right? Does it ever. So I took several. Dozen. Granted, the pictures don't do it justice, but I took one on the road there and then drove on to the cemetery. When I got there, instead of reading and praying like I usually do, I just stared and took pictures. Then, when I thought it couldn't get any more beautiful, the sun slowly started to come up. I had to take a whole new batch of pictures for that. It was just amazing. I wish you could've been there with me. God was all over that sky and he talked to me so loud and clear through it. I've put several in a post below this one, but again, they don't do it justice.

One more thing....since I was a kid, I've always loved when the sun rays come through the clouds like the picture to the right. I've always, for as long as I can remember, thought of God when I see that. I don't know why. It just seems like God shining down from above. I bought this framed saying (below) a long time ago just for the picture. I keep it in my office. I mean, I like the saying, but I really just like the picture because it's God for me. I saw that again this morning. Check out this picture of a stray ray making it's way to Griffin's grave marker.


Again, tell me God isn't talking through this. It's so obvious. He's there. He cares. He's comforting. He's healing. He's present. I actually said to God this morning, "How come I've never seen You so clear as I do now?" I love that He's making His presence so obvious to me. He keeps giving me gifts even though I don't deserve them.

This morning God gave me a very unexpected, but wonderful gift.


Yes, He gave me an amazing sky and sunrise.

But most importantly, He gave me His presence.

And it was a gift I'll never forget.



I love God, Griffin, my Girl, and my Guys.

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert

Pictures from God. August, 17, 2011

This is the first one I had to pull over to take. It just got better from there. (Click on them to make them larger if you want.)

One Year Ago Today

It was today. Friday. First full day of school. 2010. I can't believe it's been a year. What a year it's been! The best and worst year of my life. All in one. Was it the best? I think it was. Was it the worst? I know it was. So what happened exactly one year ago today...right now....at this exact time. Here's the story:

I was sitting in my office just as I am now. I was on my planning period just as I am now. I was busy at work but excited that another year had started. A new group of kids. I'm always excited at the beginning of the year. I'm anxious to start back. I don't dread it. That's a good thing, right? If I did, I would need to look for a new career. But I love what I do and look forward to each new year. Do I have bad days? Of course. Who doesn't at their job? (If you don't, don't tell me.) And I'll admit by the time May rolls around, I'm ready to go. I'm ready for summer. I just need a break. Everyone does. Summer break for schools are a very good thing. It's just needed. Ok, I'm getting off subject. Anyways, I was sitting at my desk when my phone rang. I answered and it was my wife. She asked if she could come see me for a second during my planning period. I said sure. What a wonderful wife, I thought. Wanting to come see me on my first day. She really does love me. She already misses me. She arrived about 5 minutes later. So fast. Wow, she really does want to see me, I thought.

I heard her come in but didn't look up immediately. I was working on something...can't remember what...and I never will because what happened next emptied out my brain completely and put a brand new volume of thoughts in there. I looked up and smiled. She didn't really smile back. She had shut my office door. I could tell she was a little upset. My first thought was of course....what have I done? I was sure I had done something wrong and I was really racking my brain to figure out what it was. I was about to just ask...it's easier that way....when she spoke first. I have no idea what she said. It's all a blur now. Something about...I knew something felt different...I'm just going to tell you....I can't believe it but...I don't really remember any of those things. All I remember was the next sentence..."I'm going to have another baby." Come again now? My jaw dropped....to the floor....actually below the floor. My jaw actually dug a hole in the floor so it could get a little lower. Susan isn't afraid to tell you she told me those words through tears. It was a shocking and scary announcement. We weren't planning, trying, expecting, any of those words to have another baby. We thought we were finished. We had discussed it before, but had made the conclusion, or so we thought. My first reaction was shock, then confusion, then more shock, then worry, but by the time we hugged and she left, there was definitely some joy and happiness in there. It took Susan a little longer, but she eventually found the same joy and happiness. After we both accepted it and just gave it to God, we knew it was a blessing and were extremely excited to be getting this wonderful surprise. But you know the rest of the story. That's why it was the worst year of my life.

But I'm also prepared to say it was the best. Why? My relationship with God today compared to my relationship with Him then...when I sat in that office picking up my jaw with a shovel....has done a complete 180. Well, I guess not 180, but somewhere in the 100's. I was doing fine then. I went to church and went through all the motions. I was generally good. I felt pretty good about my life. But I had no idea what all I was missing out on. And it took the gift and then death of my child for me to see it. Yes it's a shame it had to take that but I believe it's all part of God's plan. I see God so much clearer now. I feel him so much closer now. I understand him so much better now. I want to be with Him so much more now. My desire to share Him with others is so much stronger now. He's all that really matters now. So in that sense, as far as my salvation and eternity are concerned, it was the best year of my life.

I've still got a ways to go. I'm learning more every day. But I'm on the way, the right way. I'm on the narrow path to Heaven. Matthew 7:14.

What a year it has been!!


I love God, Griffin, my Girl, and my Guys.

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert

That Last Book - What a Revelation! (Part 2)

God is amazing! Can I just start out with that? The past three mornings I have seen the most beautiful sunrises. Pink skies. I love when the sky is that color. I've gone to Griffin's grave the last 3 mornings to spend some time with God and it's just been amazing. It's funny, the sunrise and the sky are different every morning. They never look exactly the same, but the One who created them IS the same. He will never change. His words, His love, His word, His promises, His Spirit, His Son, His eternity.....never change. But I'm grateful that his creation does. It's like a new surprise each morning when I get there. I could sit there forever.

That is if I didn't have 8 million things to do. What a busy week. School. I could say "ugh" but that sounds negative and I'm actually not in a negative kindof mood. Yes, the busyness is tough and I hate not being able to spend the time with my family that I've been used to the last few months, but I'm actually looking forward to school. I do every year. A new batch of kids = a new opportunity to influence kids and lead them toward God. Speaking of opportunities, my prayers these last few months have included a request for God to use me. I want to be His instrument and do whatever He needs done. I want to share Him with others as I've mentioned on here before. It's amazing how He is answering that prayer. People keep coming up to me saying that I need to talk to this person or that person. I hear about kids who are having troubles at home and need encouragement. Just a few days ago, God used a friend to tell me about someone that has fallen away and needs encouragement to come back to God. It's so obvious that God is answering my prayer so I'm going to do my best to talk to these individuals even though it's a little out of my comfort zone. God is calling. How can I not answer?

I got to meet a couple of very special people this past Monday afternoon. I had gotten an email from a friend that Todd Burpo, the author of "Heaven is for Real" (the book I menioned in the last post) was going to be signing copies at Lifeway bookstore nearby. I decided to go. That book helped me in the darkest point in my life and brought such encouragement and hope and I just had to thank this man. I got there 15 min. early but was still waaaaay back in line. There were a lot of people there. It's obviously affected a lot of people. I had no idea that his son, Colton would be there also. Colton is who the book is about. He's the boy that got a glimpse of Heaven. I waited about 45 mintues, longer than I was expecting, but it was worth it. When I got to the front, I told them both how grateful I was for the book and how much it helped me during a very rough time. They were both very kind. You can see their signatures. Notice that Todd wrote Hebrews 12:2. It reads...."Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." What a great reminder and summary of our goal and duty. In the book, Colton says he saw Jesus sitting there...at the right hand of God. I can't wait to see that myself.

Ok, back to Revelation. After reading Revelation, I got a strong urge to re-read the Left Behind series of books. I read these about 5-6 years ago and loved them. For some reason, I read 11 of the 12 books but didn't read the final one. Not sure why. But I've started them again. I read the first one very quickly and am now almost done with the 2nd. They are page turners and I look forward to reading each night if I have some time. I know there is some disagreement about the books and discussion about if they should be read, but I read them as fiction. They are a good story. Is that how it will happen when Christ returns? I don't know. Nobody knows exactly what will happen. We have clues, especially in the book of Revelation, but I don't read these books as an exact representation of what it will be like. Like I said, I just enjoy the story. But (you knew that was coming), you can't read those books and not think. And I think it's a good think. Huh? Did that makes sense? I just mean reading those stories does make me think about my own life and what would happen IF Jesus did come back today. Would I be taken or "left behind"? In the book, some great (and God-believing) individuals are left behind because they weren't sincere enough in their faith and I don't think it hurts to evaluate my own sincerity. I say I'm doing well with God and I feel like I am, but am I really? Deep down? Am I sincere in all aspects of my daily life? Something to think about for us all.

Now, that being said...I am comfortable with where I am. I'm not perfect. Not close. I have some hang-ups...some habits or tendencies that I know I need to work on. But I feel confident that if Jesus came back right this second, I would be welcomed home. And I don't say that with a sense of bragging or too much pride and I pray it doesn't come out that way. If it does, forgive me. But I think we are all supposed to "know" that we are saved. (I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know that you have eternal life. -I John 5:13) If we don't, we need to evaluate and figure out what's keeping us from knowing. And we need to be ready at all times. That's a good reminder to get at any time, even from a fictional book.

I've enjoyed my study of Revelation. I'm glad Carter is studying it for Bible Bowl. I hope to continue to study it and understand it because I'll be honest...I've got a long way to go. But I love the hope that the book brings. I can't wait to experience these things in eternity. And I also love that Christ himself speaks in this book. In the last chapter (22), verse 12, Christ says, "Look, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to each person according to what they have done."

Let us all strive to get that reward!

I love God, Griffin, my Girl, and my Guys.

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert

That Last Book - What a Revelation! (Part 1)

Ok, so this post is going to be 2 parts because I just have too much to say. I've been thinking about this one for a week or so...actually I've been thinking about it all summer. I'll tell you why in a second. First, the update on the Days of My Lives.....

Cross Country is going well. I lost some runners that I never had. That always happens. I have these runners...actually they are not runners because they never run....I have these students who just walk like normal humans that say in the Spring that they are going to run CC when school starts back. They get me all stinkin' excited because they are great kids and then they don't even show. When I ask, they always have an excuse. I'm too busy with school work or I really want to just focus on soccer or baseball or guitar or hopscotch or whatever!! The sad thing is that a lot of them would be GREAT runners. I KNOW they would. And their running career is over...like that! The world will never know what they could've done for the CC team and for our school and for themselves and for their lives. Kindof sad isn't it? Cue the slow violin music. I'm usually mad at them for about a day and then I get over it. It is disappointing, but they're kids. What can I expect? It's not easy being a kid. (I know b/c I still act like one most of the time.) And I guess that kind of disappointment comes with coaching any sport. But the ones I have are awesome! 22 boys and 11 girls. And I can't wait to see what they're going to do. I really want to be running with them. Badly. But I'm going to take this final week off for my heel and then try to go back.

School starts one week from tonight. One week! Yikes. And inservice starts next Sunday afternoon. Say what? Yep, Sunday afternoon. Christian school stating on Sunday. Go figure. But whatever. The times they are a-changin'. At least that's what we keep hearing. We are going to worship next Sunday night as a school faculty with our families and I'm really looking forward to that. I love worshipping with my school family. Lots of different congregations coming together and praising as one. That's what it's all about I'd say, and I think it's a great way to start off our year.

So back to this post. Here's the deal. Early this Summer I really got into this last book of the Bible. Revelation. Just the word scares some people. Is is supposed to be scary? If I asked that question based on my growing up, I might have to say yes because it was never studied and barely talked about. And if it was brought up, it was often brought up in a 'we don't understand that book so we don't try to' kind of way. But here's why I got into it. Several reasons actually. First, when we lost Griffin, we got books. Lots of books. From many different people. I've read several. And for obvious reasons, most of them were on grief or losing someone or Heaven. The ones focusing on Heaven have been my favorites by far. Hence this new blog focus. I just said "hence". Strange word. Do you ever say 'hence'? Ok, it's lost all meaning. Sorry. Anyways....."Heaven if For Real" by Todd Burpo. Loved it. And you can call me crazy all day long and I may be but I believe it. I'm sorry if that's weird....and it's not just because I need to believe it, which I do....I know it's a kid and it could be totally made up, but I have no doubts God wanted me to read that book. It was given to us multiple times and suggested many more. It was even offered to me today.....over 4 months after our loss. I felt so happy when I read it....so filled with hope and joy and encoruagement. So I believe God was telling me to feel comfort through it and to believe it. If it's not true, does it really matter? Does it really hurt to believe in something like that? We know Heaven is going to be great and that our loved ones will be there. And a lot that was in there, I already believed anyways. Does it really matter what we believe about the details? I'm getting off track, but I just really loved that book. I just finished another one that I loved. It was called "Have Heart". It was by the Berger family who lost their son Josiah at age 19. They live in Franklin, TN. It is a GREAT book and I highly recommend it. It also gives such hope and happiness and longing for Heaven. They use a lot of scripture, especially from Revelation. The point is that a lot of these books we received focused on Heaven and since Revelation is that magic Heavenly guide, I've read more than my regular share of Revelation.

Another reason - Bible Bowl. This is Carter's first year to do Bible Bowl and each year a new book is chosen. Out of all 66, this year....you guessed it....Revelation. I was pretty surprised at first. And I've heard mixed discussion on that. I've even heard of some churches choosing not to participate because of the topic. Can't say I agree with that. Revelation is inspired by God just like the other 65. Why would you skip it? But after I got over my initial surprise, I was actually excited. I'm glad it's being studied. It should be. It certainly wasn't when I was young. Now granted, Bible Bowl from what I can tell is stricly memorization of facts. These kids aren't getting a whole lot on meaning. And that could be frustrating, but that's what Bible Bowl is. It's a competition based on memorization. That's what it's always been. And that's fine. But I'm glad those who choose the book each year didn't back away from it. I'm glad they didn't skip it so as not to offend. I wish it could be the chosen curriculum for kids or at least teenagers during a class or two at church. But after the summer focus, I have to ask these questions. Is Revelation ignored or avoided? Is it studied as much as any other book? What's the deal with Revelation?

My thought it that we've chosen to avoid it or just lightly touch on it because it does scare us. We don't understand it, understandably, and so we avoid it. We don't want to be wrong. We don't want to study something that's difficult. Study Psalms instead we may think. They're comforting and make sense. Again, Revelation is just as inspired by God as any other book. He wouldn't have put it in there if He didn't want us to study it. I just hope we're not avoiding it because we're scared of it. That's not right. Is it hard to understand? Yes it is! I don't claim to understand it all. I've read it. This summer. When I had to write Bible Bowl questions for the first five chapters for camp, I read them of course and then decided to just read the whole book. I don't get it all. I still don't know if it's telling me what's going to happen, what's already happened, if it's even going to happen ever. I do believe that it is a picture of Heaven. I do believe at least part of God's intention was to show us a picture of Heaven. I have really enjoyed reading about it through these books and it makes me want to study it more.

I'll stop for now, but there's more I want to say including a certain fiction series that I've started reading again because of Revelation. Some of you may know what I'm talking about. But it's just all made me think about this book. What is it's purpose? How it can help me? You? I feel God calling me to study it and focus on it and I won't let Him down. Would love to hear your thoughts. More in a few days....

I love God, Griffin, my Girl, and my Guys.

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert

A Couple of Reminders

Don't have a long time to write today. I'm pretty busy getting ready for school. I cleaned out my office this week. Took everything out and threw away about 1/2 of it. Hadn't done that in years. Needless to say, it was pretty dirty. I even got sick due to the dust. Stuffed up. Watery eyes. Runny nose. You know. But it's pretty clean now. I'll try to keep it that way. Next week is classroom. Getting it ready because the next week starts school. Hard to believe. I got my class list and it looks good to me. Mostly because I don't really know but about 3 of the kids in there. But I'm looking forward to getting to know them. I've got high hopes that this is going to be a really good year.

Still not back to normal in my running. Heel still not 100%. I've even started wearing a brace at night that my in-laws let me borrow. I'm running when I need to at CC, but I'm still going to take it easy for another week or two.

But I really just wanted to throw out a couple of verses as reminders and encouragement. These were given out in sermons at our church last Sunday and God spoke to me through them. The first is Isaiah 55:8-9. It reads...

8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the LORD.
9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

This is the perfect verse to help me understand why things happen, even things I don't understand. It also reminds me that God is so much bigger than I could ever imagine. Just like Heaven is so much "higher" and "further" above the Earth, so God's thoughts are over ours. He knows what I need. I pray and He listens to me and is faithful to answer prayers, but it's on His time and in His plan. And I have to respect that. If a prayer doesn't get answered the way I want then I know He's got something better in mind. He knows what's best and that's what I want. His will be done. Even if I don't understand or even if I have to wait. I trust God because He knows. I want His will to be done.

The other verse was from Jeremiah 20:9. It reads:

9 But if I say, “I will not mention his word
or speak anymore in his name,”
his word is in my heart like a fire,
a fire shut up in my bones.
I am weary of holding it in;
indeed, I cannot.

I love how Jeremiah basically says it's impossible to hold the Word of the Lord in. He has to speak about God and tell others. This is how we should all be. We should be unable to keep from telling others how great God is and what He's done for us. Has God blessed you? Has God answered your prayers? Has God spoken to you or has His Holy Spirit given you a supernatural gift? If any of those are "yes" then tell others. Share it. Don't hold it in. I'm here today confessing that God has done all those things for me and so much more. He's a truly awesome God and I want everyone to know.

God is so good. He is so real and so apparent in my life. I pray the same for each of you. I hope these couple of verses can encourage you today as they did me. Have a blessed day and weekend.

I love God, Griffin, my Girl, and my Guys.

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert

God's Egg

2 weeks!! That's it. 2 weeks of summer left. Summer gets shorter every year. It seriously does. I remember growing up distinctly starting school in LATE August. Like the 26th or something. Now we register on the 9th. The NINTH!! We don't get August anymore. August is a school month. I wish we would just cut to the chase and do the year round thing. Come on! 9 weeks on...2 weeks off. That's what I want. Who's with me? Cross Country starts Monday. I'm really excited. I hope my team is as excited. Come on - running in this heat = FUN! I know they feel the same. We actually are starting tonight. I sent out an email to the team telling them I had decided to have a pre-season Ultimate Frisbee game tonight...totally optional....just for fun. I sent it out to the 40ish runners and waited for all the responses. 6 are coming. Six. Go team! I know, I know. It's last minute. Several are on trips or had plans. I can't blame them. So needless to say, it's gonna be small teams. But I'm still excited. I love playing UF.

I changed my FB profile picture. It wasn't easy. Part of me didn't want to and I know I didn't have to. I could've kept it the same forever. But it's just a small way to show that everything is ok. It's a small way to tell God that I trust in Him. He knows what's best. I don't have to dwell on anything sad because it's all good. Griffin's good. He's happy. I'm happy. I need to look ahead to when I will see him again and be even happier. To when I will see God and be something more than happy that I can't even understand right now. I changed it to the picture of God showing his love to me there on the beach. I love that picture because it's so easy to see God in it. And you know, I can see Griffin in that picture too.

God continues to speak to me in ways that are small and big. He continues to reassure me and show His obvious love for me and my family. He even uses others to share things with me and tell me things He wants me to do. God talks if you just listen. Funny how I really didn't take the time to listen until recently. Here's what he showed me in the last couple of days....

Remember the birds. Remember how when we got home from vacation and I was afraid I left God at the beach. But then I saw what God had done right outside our house. He created baby birds that had just hatched and were beautiful. I showed this picture:

Remember how I said that actually 2 had hatched and one hadn't quite gotten there just yet. We've been watching these birds the last few weeks. We've looked at them almost every day trying very hard not to disturb them too much. When we would get close, we could see the mother sitting on them but she would see us and fly to a branch on a very nearby tree. She'd watch us, probably thinking very mean thoughts. They slowly got bigger and bigger. It's funny, we knew there were 3 but it seemed we only saw 2 whenever we looked. I just assumed one was small and hidden under the others. About a week ago, I went to look once again and one of the little birds was standing on the edge of the nest. I quickly tried to back away trying not to scare him but it was a little too late. He took off. Oops. I hope he was ready to fly. He kindof disappeared into the tree. I really didn't mean to give him that push and I kindof felt bad. But I assume he's fine. We didn't hear or see him again. After he left, I could still only see one bird in the nest. Again, I assumed the other was hidden or had already flown away. The next day, I looked again and the 2nd bird that was easy to see had gone. But I didn't see an empty nest. Here's what I saw:

The third egg never hatched. Something must have gone wrong. I watched the egg for a few more days this week but it's still there. It's not going to hatch. The first 2 baby birds made it. The third did not.

Can anyone tell me that's not God talking!?

Here's what God said to me through that.....'You're not alone. These things happen. It's part of this world I created. And it's not a perfect world. I AM perfect, but the world is not. Bad things will happen. But rest assured and be comforted because you are heading to a place very soon where bad things will NEVER happen. There will be no sadness. No loss. No "unhatched eggs." Keep striving to do My will and I will bring you to Me soon to see your son and My son. '

Yep, I got all that from an egg. Funny, huh? But it's true. I don't know if that mama bird up in that tree felt sad. I'm not a big expert on bird emotions. But I felt sad for her. But it's ok. God's in charge. And He is good. He's faithful and He's preparing us all for a wonderful place beyond our comprehension. I don't know if there are birds in Heaven. I've never heard a sermon on that one. But today I'm imagining Griffin with a big smile on his face, holding a baby bird. Maybe that's silly, but it gives me comfort.

I love God, Griffin, my Girl, and my Guys.

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert

Can I Keep This Going?

It's been 10 days since I last posted. Quite the break. Maybe a needed break. Maybe I'm posting too much. It's hard to know how much to post. I could always find a topic and write some thoughts but I try to wait until I feel called to do so. I try to wait until a topic is relevant to me or others. I have been busy the last 10 days but I could've posted. I just didn't feel that strongly about anything to post on. That feeling actually led me to this post. In other words, not posting led me to think about a post on not posting. So I decided to post on the fact that I wasn't posting. Confused? Me too.

Some other news first.....

I've stopped running again. My heal really was getting better but it just wasn't like it should be so I decided to take another week off. I hate it...again, but it's probably best. CC starts next week so I'll try running then. I bought a heel-gel-pad-support-thingy for my shoe. I like it. Hope it helps. If not, I'll wear it anyways just cause it feels good.

I did do a long run a week ago Sunday. We had just gotten back from Hilton Head the night before. When we got back, we started going through the mail. I always enjoy that part A week's worth of mail at once. It's exciting for some reason. Maybe I'm weird. Actually scratch the "maybe." Anyways, one of the letters that Susan opened up said that the grave marker for Griffin was finished. It said it had been delivered to Woodlawn Cemetery and would be installed in a couple of days. Susan noted to me how that letter had been sent early in the week of our vacation and so the marker should already be installed. "I doubt it," I said. I figured it would take them a while to install it for several reasons: 1. We didn't purchase it through the Cemetary. 2. The plots didn't originally belong to us and getting them in our name has been a lenthy on-going process. I didn't figure they'd install it w/o it being in our name. 3. They are busy like everyone else. I figured it would take weeks. I decided to run there the next morning, Sunday morning. I typically do this. It's an exact 5 mile run there and 5 miles back. The run was great. Heel hurt at first like always but then went away. I got to Griffin's grave in a great time. I felt really good. As I stopped to rest and slowly walked up the sidewalk to the beautiful area that is his resting place, I could see it. It was there.

"It's there." was all I could say. I was still breathing pretty hard from the run and I just couldn't believe the marker was there. I just didn't expect it so soon. But there it was. It's beautiful. They did a wonderful job. It has my name, Susan's name and right in the middle, Griffin's name. His name is there. I think I even said "there's his name" out loud. But I quickly thought something wonderful. The marker was there. Griffin's name was there. Even his body was there. BUT HE WASN'T THERE! I know this has been stated and it's obvious but I love any reminder of this. He wasn't looking up at me. He was looking down. The four of us went yesterday in the pouring rain and added some flowers to the new vase on the new marker. It was the first time Susan has been back and the first time the boys have been at all. They agreed the marker looks great but we talked about how it's just a reminder. It's not his final home. He's with God, safe in the arms of Jesus, waiting for his brothers and parents, having an amazing time. What a blessing!!

Speaking of Griffin.... I had someone suggest that I tweak the signoff on these posts. They very kindly suggested that I add my wife and other sons. I talked to Susan about it and I do want to do that. I hope I never implied that I don't love those three. And I wouldn't want them to ever think I don't love them just as much as I do Griffin. It's just that he's been a little special lately because he did enter and exit this world a little differently than expected. But I will change my signoff. It's time.

So back to the topic. Can I keep this going? Keep what going? This. My new life. My new relationship with God. This blog. My desire to share what God, His Son and His Spirit have done for me over the last few months. Being on fire for God. Wanting to know Him and study Him and be with Him. Can I keep that going? When I didn't post for over a week, the thought..."am I losing it?"....crossed my mind. Could I not think of anything to post on because I'm losing what I've gained? Is that was that was? Since that terrible day on March 27, I have been so much closer to God. I am learning so much about Him and my relationship with Him. There is so much I want to share and talk about. It's almost a constant euphoric feeling. I don't want to lose that. Will I? I'm afraid I might. Will it get stale? Will I run out of things to share or talk about? How can I stay on fire like I am if I live another 50 years? Anybody else worry about this? I want to keep this going always. And I plan to. I'm just wondering how exactly I'm going to do that. I think I've figured out that it's going to take effort on my part. I'm going to have to work to stay in constant contact with God. I'm going to have to continue to look for ways to serve others...look for ways to share with others.....spend as much time with God as possible....and yes, keep posting away on here. This definintely helps, but it will take so much more. But I'm not giving up. I don't want to go back to the way it was....not that it was bad....but this is so much better. So I dare say it's more than a "little Christian light". It's a fire. And I don't ever want my fire to go out. (Lev. 6:13) Help me keep it going and I'll do the same for you. Let's keep the fires strong, bright, powerful, and very easily seen by others.

I love God, Griffin, my Girl, and my Guys. (How's that?)

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert

Did I Leave God at the Beach?

I appreciate the positive response to my last post. I didn't sleep much that night worrying that I had posted too much or maybe it was too personal to post. I guess I still worry what people think too much. I was just afraid some would find it uncomfortable or strange. I also worried that maybe it was just the grief talking and that five years from now I wouldn't feel the same, but you know, I think I will. Why in 5 years would I think it silly that I need to hear Griffin's name? I'll always want to hear his name. Even when my sadness and grief has all but gone (never fully gone of course), that won't make me not want to hear his name or remember him. So personally, I don't think it's just the grief talking, but it's truly something that will help me. Thankfully, I got some great feedback and wonderful supportive comments and they helped tremendously. Thanks to all of you who sent encouragement and especially to those of you who mentioned Griffin.

So we're back from vacation. Yes, we were on vacation. I made it pretty obvious on Facebook, but didn't want to make it too obvious on here. I mean, is there such a thing as posting too much on here? Probably so. Anyone can read this so I guess there could be some wacko out there that would read we were on vacation and seek out our house. Not that he would make away with anything of real value. Plus, my neighbor is a cop and he's mean. (Hope he's not reading.) So stay away robbers!! Actually, we're back, so ha ha...missed your chance. But we did just get back from a week in Hilton Head, SC. We LOVE it there! This is our 4th or 5th year in a row to go. I've lost count. It's just the perfect vacation spot. We have our favorite beach spot, our favorite parking spot, our favorite restaurants, activities and traditions. It's a wonderful week every year and this year was my favorite I think. I just felt more relaxed this year than I've ever felt. We had so much family bonding time, just the four of us, and it was what we needed.

One of the reasons this year was the best for me personally which is the same reason I love going to the ocean/beach each year is that it seems so easy to find God there. I know He's everywhere, with me 24/7, but it's so easy to see Him there in that beautiful setting. This year, with my stronger and new relationship with Him, it was just awesome. I really think God loves the ocean, the beach, you know...the tropical locations. I don't know about you, but it just seems it's so much easier to see him there when I look out at what He's created. The ocean, the horizon, the clouds, the sun - it's all just so beautiful and I can't help but think of Him when I look. I spent a lot of time with God this week. He talked. I talked. I woke up one morning at 6AM to go to the beach and watch the sunrise. I was so excited to get to spend an uninterrupted hour or so with him. It was PERFECT! There were clouds so the sun was a little hard to see itself, but I actually think the clouds made it even more beautiful. I really felt God with me sitting alone there on the beach. I spoke outloud to Him. I read His word allowing Him to talk back to me. I felt His Spirit guiding me and reassuring me in my spiritual walk. He spoke to me in other ways too. Wanna see? ......I took the picture below mainly for myself, but I thought I'd share it.
















After I took it, I noticed something very special about the picture. Do you see it? Let me help out.

I know it's not perfect, but it's there...and I don't believe it to just be coincidence. I didn't doctor the picture at all. God was there. He showed me His love in an awesome way. He reminded me right then and there that He's in charge. He has a plan for me and I'm just along for the ride. It's so much of a bigger picture than I could ever comprehend. I love when He shows me and reminds me of this. It makes me want to shout, "His will be done!"

But here's one little thing I thought about as I was driving home today.....9 hours....uggh. It actually wasn't too bad. But I was thinking....can I get that same closeness with God that I had at the beach? Can I come home to Nashville, see my "boring" old backyard and see Him as clearly? Is the smog over Nashville going to form into a heart shape? Or did I leave God at the beach? I guess it's kindof like when you go on a spiritual retreat or camp or participate in a worship service where you get that spiritual high, but then wonder if you can keep it going. I felt the same way driving home. I was wondering if I'd see God as strong as I did that day (and frankly all week) on the beach. Well, we got home, unpacked, ate supper, and I walked outside to begin mowing what had become a jungle of a yard while we were gone. I then remembered something. Before we left for our trip, we had accidently found something in one of our trees. It was a small natural container with three small blue containers in it. So I was mowing the front yard today and it hit me. I wondered if what we had seen before we left had changed. I got off the mower and quitely and carefully checked it out. This is what I saw. I took a picture for you.

The three blue containers....a.k.a. eggs had changed. They had hatched (actually, it looks like one has yet to). There's God again! He did come home with us. He did remind me once again how powerful He is. He did show me His love once again through something so small as brand new baby birds. I showed the boys and they were amazed. It was an awesome moment as our vacation came to an end (or maybe a beginning). No, I don't need clouds or birds to see how awesome God is. I shouldn't expect things like that. But you know what....He shows me anyways. That's how big His love is for me and of course for us all. So God went on vacation with us and then He even rode along for the long trip home with us as well. He's here. He's amazing. And He's my Father. Praise God!


I love Griffin and I love God.

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert

I Need a Favor

Happy 4th to all. Yes, I know I'm a day late. I have been too busy havin' a blast with my awesome family. We had a great 4th yesterday. Hope your family did as well. I love the 4th. It's right in the middle of the summer when we need a holiday. There's hardly any holidays around it so we're more than due for one when it arrives. Somehow Father's Day in June and National Smores Day in August just don't cut it for big celebration days. Plus I love the pride that arises each July 4th. I also love the fireworks. I know a lot of people that say once you've seen one fireworks show, you've seen them all, and that's true to an extent. But I still love them. Each one is new and exciting to me. Saw some great ones last night. Also saw a lot of USA pride throughout the day. Made me feel like this country is one big family. Also makes me feel blessed to live here which I often take for granted.

I'm running again. Yay! Man, I've missed it. I took 2 weeks off trying to get this heel to heal. It's better but not healed, but I'm tired of waiting. It only hurts in the morning. And when I put pressure on it. And when I step on it wrong. And....nevermind. It is better than it was. I'm hoping it will eventually and gradually just get back to normal. But I've run 4 days now including 10 on Sunday. Felt great. Hot, but great. I had to start back at some point. I'm going to have to keep up with some much younger and much more in shape (I hope) Cross Country runners in just a few weeks. Can't wait!

So I need a favor. From you. Yes you. You reading this. Not that we deserve anything else. Since our family experienced the tragedy of losing our son, Griffin a little more than 3 months ago, we have been given so much. There has been so much outpouring of love, prayers, thoughts, kind words, gifts (amazing gifts), generosity, and care. And it continues! We are still remembered often with all of the above. God has truly shown us how blessed we are to have so many wonderful friends. From church friends to school friends to Facebook friends to neighborhood friends to longtime friends to life-long friends and of course to family, we are so blessed and we wish we could do something to thank each of you personally. But we can't. The only thing we can do is pray for you all and return the favor if you ever have a need. And we hope and pray you would let us know if you ever need anything from us. So I hate to personally ask for another favor, but I really think I need this. If possible. What do I need? I need to always hear his name.

Griffin.

Maybe I'm crazy...again (stating the obvious) and maybe this is just my weird thing, but it scares me a little. And I'm not accusing anyone of doing anything wrong. But here's an example.....I put up a picture today on Facebook of our family on the 4th yesterday (the one seen here). We immediately got several comments about what a great looking family we have. And I agree. Except for the tall guy with a big nose, our family looks pretty good. At least I think so. But I couldn't help but think how much better it might look with a little baby boy in the picture. And I don't mean to say I'm angry at the comments that were made. They were so kind and thoughtful. For some reason, it just made me think about Griffin too. I'm sorry. I don't want to dwell on this loss. I don't want to keep bringing up something sad. I'm not trying to get more sympathy or anyone to feel sorry for me or my family. So like most things on here, I had mixed feelings about posting anything about this. I promise this is not to dwell on a sad situation. If it makes you sad, I'm sorry. I truly am. But to be honest, I do still get sad sometimes. I hope that's ok. I'm pretty sure it is. I'm sad for us. I'm sad for me. I'm not sad for Griffin. I'm happy for him. It's a selfish sad. And please believe that I'm happy more often than sad because it's true. Seriously. But even though Griffin is in Heaven and that makes me so happy and it has brought me so close to God, I can't help but think what it would be like if he were in that picture. What would our lives be like right now if he were here on Earth instead of in Heaven? So maybe we do have a good looking family, but wouldn't the picture look so much better with my 3rd son in it? I'm just scared that he'll one day be forgotten.

Maybe this is a normal fear. But here's how real it is. He's my Facebook profile picture. Griffin and me. I love the picture. But I have typically changed pictures every so often. However, I'm scared to change this one. I have a great picture I'd like to replace it with and almost did the other day, but I got scared. What if I remove the picture and he's forgotten? I can't bring myself to change it. Not yet. I also considered changing how I sign these posts. "I love Griffin. I love God." Is it getting old? I questioned myself. But I don't think I'll change it. I need to keep posting his name. So I'm just letting you know of my fear. Maybe it's irrational and a little dramatic, but it's there. So back to the "favor" I need......if you feel comfortable, I'd love to hear his name. When you make comments or send kind emails, use it. In 5 years, I'd love to hear "Can't wait to see Griffin" or "Bet Griffin is having a great time right now" or even as simple as "I haven't forgotten Griffin." It won't make me sad or uncomfortable. It'll make me happy. I like to hear it. It keeps him from being forgotten. At least in my mind.

So feel free to use his name if you can. Always. Forever. No problem if you can't, feel uncomfortable or don't want to. But he had one. He was a person. He was our son. And always will be. I believe he's in Heaven waiting and even watching and listening when God allows. We won't forget his name. Please don't forget it either.

And once again....2 words that could never, ever be enough....Thank You!


I love Griffin and I love God.

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert

How Much is Too Much?

I'm having some weird dreams. I don't know why, but lately I've been having very long, very detailed dreams. I've always dreamed, but they seem to be so vivid and involved lately. Not sure why. Last night I dreamed that I was helping to make a commercial or advertisement of some sort. I was the camera man and my friends and all were participating in some type of contest. Our video was really good, but way too long and involved (just like the dream). I also dreamed that I broke the law with some friends. I can't remember now what we did but we were running from the police. We got caught and one at a time got arrested. I remember feeling so disappointed in myself but also relieved to have been caught and free of the guilt. Now, let me assure you that I have NOT broken the law and have no plans too. And I don't feel guilty about anything at the moment. So what does it mean? Why are my dreams so vivid lately? Just curious. Anybody else have weird dreams?

My boys are changing. They are growing up quick. They are now 9 and 7. My oldest, Carter is growing taller as we speak. I could tell he was getting taller and several have commented the same. Apparently he's going through a growth spurt. He's very excited about it. I have mixed emotions. If he gets taller than me, I may have an issue. My youngest, Max is not growing taller but he's just growing more rebellious. He doesn't want to cut his hair. He's Samson apparently. We told him that we're going to the beach soon and it's going to be hot, but he still doesn't want it cut. We've agreed he can keep it long through the summer, but he's beginning to look a little Fabioish. He also has 4 tatoos. They are stick-on or wet-on or whatever, but he wanted to be like the big boys on the mission trip last week and put on tatoos (thanks big boys!). Actually, he's always liked those things. Last night, he had a basetball game and so he had on his tank-top style jersey. When I asked him if he wanted to wear a shirt under it so nobody would see his tatoos, he said, "No, I want them to be seen so I can look like real basketball players." Great! My little Rapunzel also wants to express his body-art. When did I lose him?

I want to go to Heaven. Have I mentioned that on here? Maybe once or twice. After all, it's the theme of this whole blog. But I really want to go. Like, I can't wait. My wife posted on her FB page a note last week. I read it while I was on my mission trip. It was beautiful, heartfelt and I loved it. I told her how much I enjoyed it. But I did slightly disagree with a point she made and we had a good discussion about it. We are waiting on the grave marker for Griffin to be made. It will be a triple marker with all 3 of our names on it. Susan mentioned that she doesn't want to see her name. She doesn't want to be reminded of her own death. She wants to live a long life watching her boys grow up. I understand. There is a part of me that feels the same. It can be very gloomy and depressing to think of your own death. And I also want to see my boys grow up. I want to hold my grandchildren one day. I want to continue to experience life with Susan and grow old with her. But....and let me just stop here and say that what I'm about to say may sound really weird and abnormal. Maybe it is. Maybe I'm crazy or irrational. But this is how I'm feeling. The thing is.....there is another part of me that doesn't want that stuff at all. There is a part of me that is ready to die.

I won't mind seeing my name on that grave marker. For me, it will just remind me that this life is only temporary. This world with it's fears, worries, troubles, tragedies, and death will be over soon and forever will begin. Maybe part of it is because we lost Griffin, but I'm ready for that forever. I know I'm going so I want it to start. I honestly wouldn't mind if my life ended tomorrow. I can't wait for Heaven. Now, is that too much? How much is too much? I don't want to be selfish. I don't want my family to grieve. I know my boys need their dad and trust me, I'm not suicidal or anything like that. I don't want to leave my boys or my wife, but if that's God's plan for me...to leave tomorrow....I'm ready for it. I'll trust Him that when it's time...it's time. And I honestly don't care when that is. So I've recently been asking God and myself...is there such a thing as wanting Heaven too much? Should I be having these thoughts and feeling this way? Should I ask God to come soon or even to take me soon as I've prayed a few times. Maybe I'm wrong, but again, it's how I feel.

I don't know what my life holds. I don't know how long I'll live. If I had to guess, I'd say that I'll live for a long time....80 or 90 years. I'll watch my sons get older. I'll watch their children and maybe their children. And that's fine with me. That would be a wonderful blessing from God. But I'm also fine if it all ends tomorrow. I'm so excited and ready for Heaven to begin anytime. I want to see my Griffin again. I want to hold him. But most of all, I want to see my Father, my God, my Lord, my Savior, my Jesus. I want to talk to Jesus and touch his nail-scarred hands. I want to sing praises to God while I look upon His face. I want to hold Griffin in my lap while I do so. I want that so badly. Is that too much? I hope not.



I love Griffin and I love God.

Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)

-Albert