I just rearranged my office. The one at church. Not the one at school. Although that's on the summer agenda. It'll take a week. It's a mess. This one only took a few hours. It looks pretty good if I do say so myself. Now I guess I should do some work in it. But I'm enjoying just sitting here looking at it right now. It's nice to change things up every once in a while. Get a fresh start. Maybe that's true in some areas of life too.
I haven't run much at all this week. Only 8 miles. I've been trying to heal my heel. I plan on doing about 5 tonight but that'll be it for the week. I'm also going to take it easy next week as I'll be on a mission trip. Hopefully the two light weeks will help. It's still pretty sore. Still trying to lose a little weight but it's hard when I'm not running. Always trying to eat better but that's a challenge. We seem to eat out more in the summer and eating healthy is something I always say I'll do when I'm not hungry but when it's meal time, I'm all about the carbs. I did eat blueberries yesterday for the first time ever (not in a muffin). Not too bad. Heard they're pretty healthy. I love strawberries and spinach. Heard those are good too. But part of me likes eating what I want to eat. That's one of the reasons I run....so I can eat!
I'm remembering a lesson and song from my childhood. I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart. Where? Remember the lesson you also heard as a kid about JOY...how it stands for Jesus, Others, Yourself.... That's where our priorities should be. While that's true to an extent, I'd like to propose that it might should be JYO. I've got the jyo in my heart? Doesn't sound quite as good. But here's my reason....For so long in my relationship with God, that's how I've lived my life. I've always tried to put God and Jesus first which is where they should be. But after that, I've tried to please others. I've tried to make others happy. I've worried about what others think. I've put others second, just like the lesson. And while that's probably normal for a lot of people and good in some ways, I've often forgot about myself. I've never really focused on myself and my own relationship with God before. At least not to the extent I've been doing in the last few months. Ever since Griffin died, I've been taking a lot more alone time with God to build our relationship, to discover his plans for me, to get to know Him, His son, and the Spirit, to find out who I am, what God expects, and where I'm going. I'm getting to the point now where I personally think it's more important to get one's own life right with God FIRST before going out and spreading it to others. How can we tell others about God and what He can do for them when we don't even know ourselves? How can we share with others about the relationship they can have with God when our relationship with Him is less than strong? If I can get my relationship with God to a healthy status, then I can spread it to others. And actually, when I do get to that point, I will naturally affect and influence others and everything will fall into place.
Once again, God reassured me in this point. I was already planning to write about this and I just "happened" to read something along these lines. God is amazing! Here's how He spoke to me this morning.... I'm still reading the book "Grieving the Child I Never Knew" and the devo. this morning was called "It's Pitcher Filling Time". The author talked about that in her own grief, she was so worried about others: family, friends with needs, job, activities, etc....that she forgot to take time for herself. She forgot to fill her own pitcher so that she would be able to pour it out on others. Now she was approaching it from the standpoint of taking time for one's self to relax, read, study, pray, do activities she enjoys and those are all good and important. But I am just focusing solely on getting myself right with God first, before trying to teach and affect others.
By the way - it's working. These last few months have been such a mix of emotion. Sad for obvious reasons, but so happy in the fact at the good that has come. I have never felt closer to God and it's because I'm taking the time to focus on Him. I'm seeking Him and what He wants. I'll never stop doing this. But now that I feel at a better place, I am starting to feel ready to move on to the O of JYO. This is why I enjoyed last Saturday (FaithWorks) so much. This is why I posted last time that I do want to be used more. I feel good with God and I want to share it. So go ahead. Put Yourself 2nd. Then put others 3rd.
Maybe it SHOULD be JYO? What do you think?
I love Griffin and I love God.
Keep runnin'. The PRIZE awaits. (Php. 3:14)
My Weekend with the President (Kid President)
4 years ago